It's hard to be down and out while also feeling grateful. You may try the above suggestions and find that you begin to get angry. You start to feel like all this self-work and self-reflection is pointless and you should be able to feel and say and eat and think and watch what you like. This is totally normal.
This is the ego defending itself. It's throwing up any obstacle it can into your path. Its main goal, remember, is to maintain the separation. This whole practice of dissolving ego is like one big detox. You know the headaches, cravings, and bad mood that can follow a night of indulging? That's your liver detoxing. The anger and self-righteousness you begin to feel after starting this process is the same thing.
And just like a hangover, all you can do is wait it out and make the best choices you can stomach. When the anger strikes, grab a piece of paper and begin writing down all the things for which you are grateful. Start small and keep writing. Is the sun coming through the window? Or maybe it's raining and you love the rain. Maybe your favorite show is on later.
Maybe your socks match and that makes you happy. Just write it down. This is your one small step back toward your path. Working on yourself in this way can be exhausting, so don't feel like you've failed if you have a fearful or anxious thought. Striving for perfection is a trait of the ego too. So remember that each breath, each moment, each movement you make is your destination. Even as you begin, know you have already arrived. Want your passion for wellness to change the world?
There is nothing wrong with striving for individual achievement as long as it does not adversely impact our immediate and greater surroundings. LaRae Quy. A very important article, Lolly. Ego is very difficult for us to understand…when it befriends us and when it becomes our enemy, and the difference between the two.
It is that intertwined and complex relationship that makes it so difficult to recognize…friend or foe! The word EGO has a negative connotation well deserved but most psychologists agree that it forms in childhood and then rushes to protect us as adults. The problem is that the ego still acts like a undisciplined child…unless as adults we know how to train it to behave.
I believe this is part of our inward journey…discovering how to keep ego bridled and yet vigorous. Identification presumes ownership and authorship; thus, the ego sees and believes itself to be a personal, separate causal agent and the inferred source of its own existence. With compassion, one realizes that the structure of the ego is such that it cannot know what lies beyond. Kemetia Foley.
The ego to me is the part that likes to create an argument about itself — and then takes that argument to the outside world. The grace it offers, imperfectly human and truly formed, fearless, humble, proud — we just know it came from a different Source.
The mask IS the ego. What we unmask is the heart and its power to heal all divisions within and outside ourselves. It is made up of a compilation of arbitrary points of view supplied by mental processing and powered by feelings and emotions.
With absolute humility, the ego dissolves. It is a collection of arbitrary mental processes that gain force only because of vanity and habit. If one lets go of the vanity of thought, it dissolves. All thought is vanity. All opinions are vanities. The pleasure of vanity is therefore the basis of the ego—unplug it and it collapses.
The ego is neither bad nor an enemy, but merely an illusion to release so that something far better can replace it. Simon Harvey. In dressing each morning who is dressing you, making you up, and putting on those final touches on before stepping out to meet the world. Your authentic self, your ego, or a mixture. Some may say that a door is no longer a door when it is ajar.
Are we no longer who we are when our mask is on, or is it part of who we are. Is our authentic self once seen at birth then moulded and painted as we grow, never to be seen again, but only to been experienced by the self within.
Without the ego can we survive in the world that is full of egos? Can we interact, be taken seriously, make change happen. Perhaps in a world of no weapons, no material possessions, no predators, no internet eeek! But that is not our world.
Whether we believe this or not, it is an interesting point in so far as the ego. Is this the ego talking to our authentic self, is our concern for the future driven by our ego, a mask of leadership, a hat of command? Or is it about balance and the ego is just part of who we are, just as markings on some animals are there to confuse and camouflage their real self.
I think I have to go back to the balance of nature and the planet we live on to see that while it is important to know what you are wearing, you should also be able to see how this can change outcome and affect. There is no setting sun, it is what our minds have created and accepted. Leaders are leaders because we have made them so. When we stop following they are no longer a leader, this is why MLK is and still is a great leader, because so many people still follow his examples and ideas.
I like the fact that you put the EGO as a mask, because like a mask it does not change who the person is behind it. It just allows that person to do somethings that they may not have had the strength to do otherwise. It may give them the extra inch needed for people to stop and take notice and in this crazy ever flattening world and inch may make a lot of difference.
Get to know your ego, learn from it, study it, be comfortable with it. It may save you one day, it may make a persons day, it may create an event that changes the world for the better and you may just find you no longer need it and put it away. Great points Simon a lot to process, I love your passion of conviction it speaks to me on many levels of my heart. One has to see that this is just how the ego—which everyone inherits—operates, and recognize that it is not really personal at all.
The collective egos of whole nations bring about their downfall and destruction. The ego is not the actual reality or source of life or existence, and is therefore vulnerable to dissolution. It is primordial but not essentially sovereign. It is dominant only until its illusory quality is recognized. Chantal Bechervaise. Great post Lolly! And some great comments and insight too! I see ego as a mask that we put on to protect ourselves and use as a self defence mechanism.
We have to be in tune with ourselves to know when the ego is taking hold and step back and reflect. Reflect on the moment to see why we are reacting that way triggers and then re-focus on leading from the heart.
Great comment Chantal. It is the stepping back that helps us unmask the ego, for we see it for what it is… as you said, triggers, and then we need to refocus as you said to the heart. Terri Klass. Ego prevents leaders from discovering their true gifts and talents as it hides the genuine nature of people. Reality becomes self-evident when the obstructions of perception and mental activity are removed, including all belief systems. It is not really necessary to subdue the ego, but merely to unmask it and to stop identifying with it.
Greg Marcus. An ego out of balance leads to narcissism—we think we are the greatest think ever invented, or we think we are worthless. There are many attributes and personality traits that help in personal growth and evolution. On the contrary, there are many things that lead to failure, too. Like pessimism, narcissism , greed and ego. The ego is happy when it is able to take something. Scroll down for more deets.
Go out of your way to do something nice for your team member or even a stranger on the street. It will help you become a bit more humble. Try and be your genuine self for a change and see where it takes you! Here are my 5 techniques to learn to let go of our egos and enjoy life. Learning to let go of your ego is very easy in theory, however can be very difficult to execute in the moment.
When I think about times that I've been frustrated I always recognize a single thought that resonates in my head, "Drop your ego! You have nothing to lose here, but a whole life to win. I hope you've enjoyed reading and found my techniques helpful, if so please share it with your friends, it may be exactly what they need to hear.
I'd love to hear what actions you take, and what makes your life worth living. Please share your thoughts and experiences in the comment section below. Find Fani online at fanitv. International entertainment, business and sports journalist, TV personality, health and spiritual lifestyle expert and motivational speaker.
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